She was lost in her own personal river of despair.
And he told her he would pull her out.
But when she crumbled at his feet,
He left.
I fell in love with a sad boy,
a sad boy that didn't like to talk.
And me?
I was a sad girl that needed to.
I think she forgot what happiness felt like.
She thought she was happy when she was with him.
That was not happiness.
She was just feeling not so lonely anymore.
I wasn't ready to lose you.
I wasn't ready to lose you because giving my feelings to someone
takes all my strength,
and I wasn't ready to do it all again.
I didn't try hard enough to fix us.
I made him feel like I didn't love him anymore.
Spoiler alert:
I loved him more than I loved myself.
I put everything into fixing us,
And he gave up on me.
“We’re unfixable,” he would say.
He just wasn't willing to try.
I used to saturate myself
with the final feeling left inside me.
And when I felt numb again, I took yours.